WARNING! You May Already Be a Suspect!

I think it was in the movie PCU when David Spade said the most intelligent thing that I've ever heard about today's society. I won't quote this, but it's along the lines of:

"Nowadays you can't even comment on a woman's clothing without getting a sexual harassment lawsuit filed against you."

Sexual harassment is quite frankly one of the BROADEST and most RETARDED crimes in the history of the world. And, thanks to these special-interest groups who include women who don't shave their legs, the long list of offenses keep growing and growing and growing.

Our school recently had the distinct pleasure of having a "Sexual Harassment" assembly, which truly defined the law in whole. Now, ladies and gentlemen, breathing wrong on a member of the opposite sex can get you arrested. Inadvertantly touching a leg or an arm COULD get you thrown in the slammer with Uncle Joe and the crack dealers. Commenting on how cute Mary Jane Roddencrotch's butt looks in those pants can result in a fine or inprisonment.

Hey, I just had a great idea. Let's have this really moronic law that forbids EVERYTHING fun about chasing the opposite sex, and when they break the law, we can throw them in jail where they will be sexually harassed by dropping the bar of soap onto the concrete floor. That would be cool, right? OH WAIT...my fault...it's already been done.

This writer is sick and tired of hardcore lesbian groups, gays, and other victims of minor sexual harassment crimes bitching and complaining. You've got what you want. You can now send good ol' Brunswick Stew to hard time just with a wink and a friendly little wet willie. You can send that person you hate to jail just by telling administration that he called you a "queer." Please shut up about your human rights.

Don't arrest us for having human nature. Juvenile can spank girls' butts on his music video...why can't we have our prime as well? Don't arrest us as a public. Blame it on the media.

Or do away with these moronic laws. I like the second choice better.

-Now that you've read something, he's written. Wouldn't you like to find out more about Brunswick Stew? Here You Go.