-So
its like this, Goc was throwing ideas at us as to what we should write a column on.
Somehow I got the topic of doing a top ten list of my favorite comic book heroes.
What? Like I'm the comic geek around here or something? Ok, so sure...theres a
picture of me with Spider-Man on my bio page...and so yeah, I own the Cyclops Oakleys from
the X-Men movie and the sword from Blade. Does that make me a junkie?
Does...ah hell, I guess it does...well here we go then.....
Top 10
Super Heroes According to Soup
Rank |
Picture |
WHY?!?: |
#10. |
 |
Ghost Rider - How could you not love
flaming skulls and motorcycles? Most women dig the whole motorcycle thing, since
they're basically really big vibrators once you get them going. So even with your
head on fire, you're sure to be a babe magnet. Ghostie knows this Not to
mention all the leather and spikes....and getting to be the spirit of vengeance lets you
kick all sorts of ass when you need to. |
#9. |
 |
The Flash - Who wouldn't want to have
superspeed? Hell if I had that power I might actually get some stuff done during the
day, instead of sitting around wondering why I don't have enough time to do
anything. Plus the fun fact that in the time it took me to write this, I could've
ran out to Tama, gave Shooks a big freakin wedgie and ran back, makes for all kind of fun
uses. Could also quickly become a rich man when you don't have to pay for gas. |
#8. |
 |
Bluntman and Chronic - Kevin Smith is
GOD!!! 'Nuff said. |
#7. |
 |
Superman - Can't have a top ten comic
heroes list without Superman in it. I'm pretty sure thats against the law.
Besides the decked out Superman dvd comes out May 1st and I'm pretty jacked about
that. Who didn't pretend to be the man of steel at least once in their
childhood? He's the first and ultimate superhero, no getting around that. |
#6. |
 |
The Badger - How many of you out there are
wondering...who the hell? Well he's Wisconsin's one and only real superhero.
His only real power is being able to talk to animals, but he's a superb martial artist and
well....is pretty much a psychotic. He tends to call everyone
"Larry" no matter what their name may be. Definately an offbeat hero
for an offbeat guy like myself. |
#5. |
 |
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - Now I'm pretty
sure you've all heard of these guys. Except I'm talking about the original kick ass
turtles, not the pizza eating pansies they became on saturday mornings and in the second
two movies. There was a pretty good article on them on IGN a couple of weeks ago, go
here to check it out http://scifi.ign.com/comics/6596.html
I can't say it any better than they did. Um....Cowabunga!! |
#4. |
 |
Gambit - Ah, Remy Lebeau...I can't quite put
my finger on what it is that makes me like him so much. Maybe its that he can speak
French and could hold and intelligent conversation with Rave? Nah, thats not it...ah
yeah, not only is he mega smooth with the ladies (anybody that can win Rogues heart has to
be the man), he also has a kickass power. In that earlier Shooks wedgie
example...with Gambits power, while performing the wedgie I could charge up Shooks
Underoo's and blow his nuts clean off....now that'd be comedy. |
#3. |
 |
Spider-Man - Cool powers, Cool Costume, Mega
Hot Wife, Blockbuster Movie in the works...what more could you ask for? Marvel's
flagship hero and one of the greatest of all time. A scrawny nerd that always got
the shaft, suddenly lucks up and becomes a hella cool hero. Think Goc, that could
happen to you someday! |
#2. |
 |
Wolverine - Ok, so he's Canadian...but I
won't hold that against him. After the X-Men movie who out there doesn't love this
comic icon and poster boy for weird hairstyles? If I had unbreakable bones and could
heal from just about anything I assure you I'd be out doing some really crazy shit right
about now. Plus, Wolv first appeared in the Oct. 1974 issue of the Hulk...I was born
in Oct. of 1974....coincidence? Yeah probably so...but it still sounds cool.
Shooks: "How do we know its really you?"
Soup: "You're a dick"
Thank you!!! Good night!!! |
#1. |
 |
Batman - Holy Handgrenades
Batman!!! You're top of the list!!! Stephen
King said it best in his intro to Batman #400......Batman is the hero any of us could be,
given the motivation and dedication. (Of course the big bankroll for the gadgets
wouldn't hurt...hehe)
He has no powers, no skills that the rest of us
couldn't learn....yet recently he managed to defeat the rest of the Justice League by
himself.
So Bats gets the top spot on my list, even in spite
of that whole nipples on the costume tragedy that the movies have become. |
Would like to thank Mile High Comics as the source for my images,
its a good place to order any issues you might be looking for. Especially if you
wanna see exactly who in the hell the Badger is. Thats it for me...so until I
bite into a can of radioactive soup and get super broth powers....I am the Soupsta |
