Hannibal,
Cast Away, Crouching Tiger, O Brother, Traffic...it's been one hell of a winter to be a
movie viewer. The cold weather hasn't been enough to stop me from attending great movie
after great movie this winter. But what's coming soon? What movies put asses in theater
seats this Spring? We can't predict box office success, but we know the movies we want to
see this Spring....
Spring
Movies I Must See (Top 10)!
Goc's
Picks:
Rank |
Movie |
Description: |
#10. |
 |
Down to Earth - Plot: A struggling black comedian
dies and switches bodies with a much older white man. -I know this is already out, but my lazy ass has yet to get to the theater.
Can Chris Rock do wrong? I know this type of movie has been done a million times, but Rock
can save it. Did you see his MTV Diary, if not you're missing proof that Chris Rock is the
funniest man on the planet...no contest. |
#9. |
 |
Knockaround Guys - Plot: The film follows four
sons of well-known Brooklyn-based mobsters and their desperate fight to retrieve a bag of
cash in a small Montana town ruled by a corrupt sheriff. -Diesel, Malkovich, and Hopper all in the same movie, can this not be good?
But believe it or not, it's a comedy. Seth Green is also invovled, who is always
hilarious. Malkovich showed he can be funny in Being John, and Diesel is 100% flava. I'm a
mark already. |
#8. |
 |
The Caveman's Valentine - Plot: A cave-dwelling man sets
out to track down the killer of a homeless boy and bring him to justice. -A psychological thriller and it has Samuel L. Where do I send my money? My
favorite genre and one of my favorite actors, I'm wetter than the Atlantic Ocean during El
Nino just thinking about it. |
#7. |
 |
Freddy Got Fingered - Plot: A man is forced to move back
in with his parents, then refuses to leave. -I'll admit it...yes, I'm a fan of Tom Green. It's true he can be a
complete idiot and freakishly annoying, but I laugh during his show and loved his parts in
Road Trip. Sue me. |
#6. |
 |
The Mexican - Plot: A man tries to transport an ancient
gun called The Mexican, believed to carry a curse, back across the border, while his
girlfriend pressures him to give up his criminal ways. -Let it be known, I'm far from a big fan of Julia Roberts. I don't know
what my problem is, but I find her hard to like. But with Brad Pitt and James Gandolfini
involved I still mark out for The Mexican. If this was more violence, less comedy this
would be #1 on my list. |
#5. |
 |
Joe Dirt - Plot: David Spade stars as Joe Dirt, an idiot
who works as an oil weller who is on the search for his parents who abandoned him when he
was a baby at the grand canyon. -David Spade, Love him or hate him? I can't help it, but I love his humor.
This movie also has fellow smart-ass Dennis Miller, Christoper Walken, Kid Rock, and
mullets galore. The white trash part of me can't wait to order this one on pay-per-view
via the satellite hooked to my trailer, ha. |
#4. |
 |
Memento - Plot: A man, suffering from short-term memory
loss, uses notes and tattoos to hunt down his wife's killer. -The premise is wettening. I haven't been as enticed by a story this much
since Frequency. And with less profile stars, the story is going to be the driving force
behind this movie. It may be hard to find in theaters, but I can't wait to start looking. |
#3. |
 |
15 Minutes - Plot: A famous homicide detective and a fire
marshall team up to solve a case. -Most of you have seen the trailer for this one, it's accompanied such
recent films as Traffic and Hannibal. This one looks damn exciting even if it's similar to
Mad City and Natural Born Killers. But who cares what it's similar to? Deniro is in it, it
will be great...nuff said. |
#2. |
 |
Along Came a Spider - Plot: A congressman's daughter under
Secret Service protection is kidnapped from a private school by an insider who calls Det.
Alex Cross, sucking him into the case even though he's recovering from the loss of his
partner. -The prequel to the
great serial killer movie, Kiss the Girls. This time no Ashley Judd, but I could care
less. Morgan Freeman plays a great cop and is in good movies..period. I don't see this
dominating the box office, but I know I'll be there opening night. |
#1. |
 |
Blow - Plot: A young man works with Colombian drug
traffickers to smuggle cocaine into the United States in the 1970s. -Sure it sounds like a porno movie, but I can't help myself, I want to see
this movie...I MUST SEE THIS MOVIE! Johnny Depp + Ray Liotta + Pee Wee Herman + Cocaine +
Ted Demme directing = golden. Think Goodfellas meets Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. This
is one of those movies where I saw the preview and I already thought of not only going to
it, but purchasing it on DVD. But I thought that about Hannibal too, so I could be wrong.
But as of now, I want to see this movie like a coke-head needs another line. |
Vigilante's
Picks:
#10. |
 |
The Fast and the Furious - Plot: A bunch of LA street gang youths adapt sports cars into dangerous
weapons which they race illegaly. As the cops close in on the racket, one falls for a
female racer whose brother leads one of the gangs. -Yeah, this movie
looks like its straight b-movie material. But isn't that what made the man known as Vin
Diesel what he is today. I mean, caneyou really go wrong with a bunch of gun scenes, sweet
ass car chases, and Vin Diesel? I think not. |
#9. |
 |
The Forsaken - Plot: Heading to Florida for a wedding, a young man picks up a
hitchhiker whose not all he seems to be - he's a vampire hunter out to stop the
bloodsuckers and soon the road trip begins taking dark and deadly turns. -Vampires and Guns with a road
trip? Oh god yes, I'm there. This movie seems like it was tailor made for the Vigster
here, and I'm sure not going to let the studios down. |
#8. |
 |
Knockaround Guys - Plot:The film follows four sons of
well-known Brooklyn-based mobsters and their desperate fight to retrieve a bag of cash in
a small Montana town ruled by a corrupt sheriff. -Ok...so let me get this straight. Dennis Hopper, John Malkovich, Vin
Diesel, and Seth Green are alliin the same movie? Then why the hell am I writing this ish,
lets see this damn movie!!! |
#7. |
 |
Freddy Got Fingered - Plot: A man is forced to move back
in with his parents, then refuses to leave. -Tom Green is an ass, no doubt about it. He sucked an udders milk sac for
God's sake. However digusting and annoying he is, he still makes me laugh. So, I have to
see this one. Non-Green fans should stay away. |
#6. |
 |
Enemy of the Gates - Plot: Based on a true story. During the Siege of Stalingrad, one of the
bloodiest battles of WW2, a Russian and a German sniper play a deadly game of cat and
mouse with each intent on putting a bullet in the other's skull. -Ed Harris, Jude law, Joseph Feinnes and war picture make Vigilante there
every time. Some of the best actors, a true story, and a budget that would make some
action films shudder....and it was filmed in Europe. This had Vigi here interested the
second the first clip flashed across the screen. |
#5. |
 |
Original Sin - Plot:Historical romance/thriller about a young American bride who
travels to Cuba with her new, wealthy husband. Once there, however, marital fidelity is
the last thing on her mind -Wow, this trailer
was a very grabbing one to say the least. The story of betrayal has never looked so
intense before, and here the two players in the game are Antonio Banderas and Angelina
Jolie. Heh, and even if the movie doesn't live up to what I think...Angelina will be ass
naked. |
#4. |
 |
Along Came A Spider - Plot: Suspenseful sequel to Kiss the Girls follows detective Alex Cross
(Freeman) as he investigates another series of mysterious kidnappings. This time, he has
the help of a young FBI agent (Potter). -Another
one of my favorite books being turned into movie sequels. Like the first movie, this movie
will be nothing short of eery. Morgan Freeman is one of the most underated actors out
there, and I can't wait to see him on the screen again. I will, however, miss Ashley
Judd's fine ass. |
#3. |
 |
Spy Kids - Plot: Wacky comedy about two children who, after their mother and father
are kidnapped, discover their parents are former spies. They only way to get them back are
for the pair to become the world's youngest secret agents. -You're probably reading this choice, and thinking...wtf?!? But before you
do, you might want to take a gander at the trailer. This movie is a lot more than a kids
movie, its a special effect laced action film with kids at the helm. And with the great
Robert Rodriguez ("From Dusk Till Dawn", "Desperado") at the helm, my
interest is more than peaked |
#2. |
 |
The Mexican - Plot: Romantic crime comedy about rascal petty crook (Pitt) whose stormy
relationship with his girlfriend (Roberts) self-destructs when he accepts a risky job
south of the border. Soon she becomes embroiled in underworld doings when he absconds with
a rare pistol meant for his boss. -The best
female actress in Hollywood now, hands down. After coming off her great oscar winning
performance in "Erin Brockovich", Julia turns back to what has made her
America's sweetheart...comedy's. Roberts, with the always entertaining Pitt, and a plot
line that makes my mouth water...I look foward to this movie with each passing second. |
#1. |
 |
15 Minutes - Plot: A action thriller/black comedy about a detective and an arson
expert who team up to solve a series of strange fire-related murders which the tabloids
are very interested in and desperate to find out anything they can on it. -This looks to me like the movie that is just going to know my socks off.
Not only is it a complete smack in the face to the media, but it stars one of the greatest
actors of all time...not to mention Edward Burns. The moment I first laid eyes on the
trailer last year, I knew I was in love. |
-So there ya have it
folks, the movies that we feel will give you the most bang for your bucks. There seems to
be an agreement between Vigilante and The Goc that "15 Minutes", "Along
Came A Spider", and "The Mexican" are the most popular of the movies, while
Vigilante is looking for "Spy Kids" to be more than meets the eye and the Goc is
going for Depp in "Blow" to pull some movie muscle. Go on your own if you dare,
but if you end up seeing the next "Battlefield Earth"...don't come to GYEAH.COM
crying. We have spoken.
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