TV Sucks Dick!
A Story by
|I'm not a smart man,
but I do know what's good and what's not. Ladies and gentleman in these times of
prosperity and the constant improvement of our daily lives one thing is seemingly being
overlooked. Yes it's time someone stood up and finally said that TV SUCKS DICK! When I was
younger, there were such TV shows as "The Cosby Show" and "Cheers".
But nowadays I turn on the TV and who do I see? CARSON DALY. This man is the antichrist. I
think its safe to say that I hate him more than any man on TV. And don't get me wrong
folks I hate a lot of people. Sick of the Backstreet Boys. I'm sick of N'sync. I'm sick of
Destiny's child and Britney Spears. Yes I said it, I'm sick of that little whore shakin'
her tight little ass all over my TV screen 10 times a day. It pisses me off. Its kinda
like when your ma and pops took you to the carnival and you wanted the 3 dollar corn dog
but you knew there was no chance in hell of getting it unless you let the buck-toothed
duck pond operator feel your genitals.
Mostly I blame MTV but I think there are more people to blame. If I had a list I'd
probably go ape-shit and start ending lives. First off I'd like to know who's responsible
for all the gay men we see on TV? Now I'm no homophobe but c'mon people I don't wanna turn
the channel and see some guy playin' tooth tackle with another dude. If my little brother
turns out gay there's gonna be hell to pay. And who's great idea was it to make John
Goodman gay? Ive never seen a straighter man in my life! You know he was having orgies
with Rosanne , Jackie, Crystal, and that lesbo chick, what was her name? NANCY!! Now that
chick had cool tattooed on her lesbian ass!
What's with these TV evangelists asking for money all the time? Every god dammed day I
turn on the TV saying that Pat Robertson wants my money. Well I'd rather star in a gay
porn with Long Dong Silver than send a dime to those criminals. I've heard of people going
broke over sending these fools money. If Christianity is such a good deal then why should
you have to fill the pockets of a few ministers who claim they do mission work in the
jungles of Africa. Bullshit, Sally Struthers has a soundstage on studio 5-A at universal
studios. And the actors? Seems like they use the same ones over and over again. Prolly
some kids from a day care center in Beverly Hills. Wouldn't that be great for an acting
resume? Oct. 22nd
.played sickly Ethipian child for Feed the Children. Feed my ass
I'm hungry right now! Bring me two chalupas and a pepsi bitch!
What conclusions have we come to today people? TV sucks I hope. But draw your own
conclusions. Look around. Doesn't it seem like the good ole' days have passed us by? I
long for the days of big -wheels and Pepsi in a bottle. Now its those damn scooters and
beer in a bottle. I quit. Someone put me outta my misery please.
-Now that you've read something, he's written.
Wouldn't you like to find out more about Hoss? Here you go.