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Rating the
Consoles An Article by |
| There's one thing
that's obvious to most GYEAH.com readers: #1. We love ranking stuff. #2. We love our damn
videogames. So with those two certainties, I figured it was a given that we should do some
videogame console rankings. So here I am, I've pulled some categories out of my ass, and
I've rated the consoles of our past (and some of our future) in some categories that I
think we all have an opinion on. Below is just my opinions, please express your own on the
GYEAH.com Message Boards. Well, here goes...
Best Console to Play By Yourself 1.
Playstation (PSX) : The system has more quality RPG's and sports games for you to not ever need friends. Suikoden, Final Fantasy, Wild Arms are all worthy of pouring dozens of hours into. And with EA Sports birthing "Dynasty" and "Franchise" modes on this system, it could keep you busy for months.
2.
Nintendo (NES) : NES built the foundation that all other videogame systems now stand upon. With titles like: Legend of Zelda, the Marios, Dragon Warrior, Baseball Stars, and Double Dragon; does it surprise anyone that the NES dominated like it did? There was a great game in every genre, hell even Kenyon's mom was known to be an NES addict, damn that Solomon's Key.
3.
Playstation 2 (PS2) : The new kid on the block has already proven it's status as one of the next greatest consoles of all-time. EA Sports has already pumped out the best of it's sports series titles and with gems like SSX, Red Faction, and Gran Turismo 3; being locked in a room alone with a PS2 is a very good thing. Friends=overrated.
Best Console for Multiplayer Action 1.
Nintendo 64 (N64) : This was the first console to have 4 controller ports right out of the box. N64 might be considered a failure in the big scheme of things, but it made every developer consider adding a 4 player option to their games. The greatest multiplayer games of all-time were on this console: Goldeneye, Mario Party, Bomberman, WCW/NWO Revenge, Mario Kart...the list goes on and on.
2.
Nintendo (NES) : I believe this is the first console to ever offer a 4 player option, even if it was an add-on device. The first game to utilize this was NES Play Action Football and gaming was forever changed when you dropped back, threw a perfect spiral to your buddy, who proceeded to juke out the two neighbor kids on the way to the end zone.
3(tie).
Playstation (PSX) : The game system that brought teens back into videogames so they could beat the hell out of their friends in the Tekkens and EA Sports titles. The PSX also offered a multitap and the ability to link up two PSX's and TV's. Many options..much flava.
3(tie). Dreamcast (DC) : Talk all the trash you want to about this system, but NFL2K1 4 player action crowded more kids around more TV's than any other game this past year. It didn't have a slew of multiplayer games, but those it had were pure classic.
Best Controller 1.
Nintendo 64 (Standard Controller) : This might cause some controversy, but never have I been as blown away by a controller than I was by the 64's on the first impression. The analog stick was first unleashed here and is still superior to Sony's. If only the C buttons didn't suck...this controller would be perfection.
2.
Dreamcast (Standard) : In many ways superior to the 64 controller, but not quite original enough to take the top sport. The controller feels perfectly at home in your hands, my only complaint is not being able to use the D pad and the analog stick at the same time.
3.
Nintendo (the NES Advantage) : Remember this bad boy? It was as big as the damn system and almost as big as my overly large head. This controller's buttons were freakishly easy to hit and even had a turbo option for some serious Track & Field ass kicking. And who didn't love unscrewing the controller ball and playing with it?
Best Looking Console 1.
Xbox : This bad boy isn't out yet, but it's already secured it's place as the coolest looking thing in your living room. Even if no games are made for it and it just sits there looking bad-ass...it's still worth 300 bucks.
2.
Playstation 2 (PS2) : Sleek and pimpy looking, the PS2 comes in a close second. The ability to stand the system either horizontally or vertically only adds to it's flava quotient. If it weren't for the unoriginal controllers, this would be #1.
3.
Sega Saturn : Besides Hoss, I don't know a single soul who owns one of these...and will openly admit it. But you gotta admit, it's one bad ass looking console. Sexy indeed.
Worst Looking Console 1.
Nintendo (NES) : We all grew up with this thing, but thank god we didn't end up looking as butt ugly as this system does now. C'mon, what's the story with the drop top hood? Someone needs to circumsize this videogame system. Why was there a hood in the first place? So your parents can't see you're playing 8 bit "Playboy Naked Adventure" where the boobies look like jagged legos? Bah!
2.
Gamecube (GC) : Am I still 7? The answer is HELL NO, Nintendo! I don't want a kiddie looking system. Am I a 12 year old girl? Am I Justin Timberlake? HELL NO! I don't want a system that looks like an IMAC! I'm straight...why isn't my game system?
3.
Super Nintendo (SNES) : Nothing too wrong or ugly here, but this one isn't going to get asked to any proms. But if we're not gorgeous, can't at least our game systems be? Is that too much to ask?
-Well that's all for my system rankings this time around. Next time we'll rank them in many more categories, but I figure this list alone will give you more than enough to rant and bitch about. Tell me I'm wrong on the:
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