China, whats the deal?

Hey kids, your friendly neighborhood Soupster comin' atcha again. Here I was sitting and thinking....what is the deal with this whole anti-Chinese thing going on right now? I know our very own Nemesis wrote about it not too long ago (Right here)

But really, how can we not like a place that has given us so many good things? Like Chinese food, Kung Fu, Bruce Lee, Jackie Chan, cool movie stuff like Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (Yeah I know thats technically from Taiwan, but its based on Chinese stuff). Not to mention really hot chicks, and hell.....most of the best toys from my childhood have "Made In China" stamped on them somewhere. So why? Why all this hate?

Then it hit me and everything became clear. Its all a dastardly plot by the true villains. A ruse to draw our attention away from the true threat. By somebody that wants to lure us into a false sense of security, so that they may attack whilst our backs are turned. Trying to get our collective eyes to focus on something in the distance. But who Soup? Who could possess that much pure, unadulterated evil?

Simple my friends.....Canada!!!!! You heard me right, Canada!!! They're scratching and digging to try and find something to divert our attention to far away lands, so that when we are most vulnerable, they can simply skate down here and take over. But oh no you hairy, burly bastards....this old Soup knows better. You can't pull the flannel over my eyes!!!

Yeah, while you're all up there in your cabins watching your local Mounties do Tom Green type stuff to their horses (Note: Don't think I actually watched Freddy Got Fingered, only read a review of it) I...hey wait a minute, Tom Green is Canadian isn't he? Damn, that explains a lot of that. His bum will be on my shoe when I put my foot up his ass!!!

Ahem....anyhow where was I? Oh yeah, while you guys are up there watching that crap and going "Eh, thats mighty funny eh?" The Soupster is down here plotting a counterattack and I'm gonna....wait, they did give us Mike Myers though, but is that really good enough to fully counteract how bad Tom Green sucks? Hmmm, guess I should count Jim Carrey too, but not sure if thats really good or bad.

Ahhh...dammit!!! See, they're trying to break my concentration so I'll forget about their plans until its too late. But its not gonna work, I've got the free world depending on what I know, and thats why I'm here, spreading the word so that you other upstanding Americans can join me in kicking Canadas ass before they get too unruly.

Before I go heres my usual comic book puzzling question. I wonder how much crap got torn up and how many test materials they had to go through before they figured out that it was ruby quartz that stops Cyclops' optic blasts?

So until Rave learns that putting and extra "e" in bear doesn't spell beer, but beear....I am Psycho Soup.

-Now that you've read something, he's written. Wouldn't you like to find out more about Soup? Here you go.