Why Are You So Mad?

It's a well-known fact that I, Jesse J Schutterle, am not the happiest f*cker on this earth. Let's keep this one short and sweet. It's too late to be messing around with big words and whatnot. This is why I'm so pissed…and they are, in no particular order:

1. God damn school - Son of a bitch I hate school. All it does is take up my time, makes me get up early and shit. I thought working second shift was gonna be cake cause I can sleep in till 230-300 at the latest. Damn that would be cool. But such a scenario is a falsity! Monday, Wednesday , and Friday I'm up at 7:30 or 8:00! Wtf! I haven't had to get up that early since high school!

2. Hoss=work horse - 4:00 to 12:00 at night! Can you believe that shit?! People around here are always talking about going out to the bars and shit. What is a bar? Is it a cylindrical object made of metal? That's my definition of a bar. And this 40 hour a week shit has got to go. Way too much time is spent on the road as well. I spend around 14 hours a week just getting to and from work. That's two hours I could be working at a homeless soup kitchen or playing with myself. Oh yeah what the hell is a weekend?

3. I couldn't get laid from a coked up necrophiliac - My hours don't permit such activities to happen. Or even such Christian-like activities as horse back riding or taking in a PG-13 movie. What a life I live. My days off are Mondays and Tuesdays. I'm a huge turn-on for women who enjoy the early week party scene. Maybe I should try picking up bar whores?

4. Thomas Richard Edward Shook - I wish I could take his life and get away with it. He purposely runs to Tama right after I leave today, thus avoiding the dirty dish situation that has arisen. I am not doing the f*cking dishes again. I did them last time. And guess what the f*cker does. When he does do the dishes he doesn't dry them. Half-asser. Then when he lays them on the counter he refuses to turn the spoons over, thus letting the salt in the water stay on the spoon after said water evaporates. Gross shit and he sees nothing wrong with it. He is a barbaric lardass. He also has a dumbass habit of leaving 10-12 dirty washcloths in the shower. Does he not know those things are reusable? I'd better throw them on his floor so they can dry out hehe.

5. God references after last week's event in NYC - What the hell people? God was there? Barbara Walters thinks so. I say why didn't he save some more lives if he was there. If I sat outside a burning building reading a magazine and let everyone die would people say "Oh he was there" and "I felt his presence"? Hell no! They'd ask why I didn't save those people. God can kiss my arse. Oh my! I can't believe I said that! Oh wait God isn't gonna do jack cause he's an armchair quarterback/absentee landlord/backseat driver.

6. People on ICQ - Ok f*ckers when I send you a message….and you don't reply back…that really and I mean really pisses this chronic masturbater off. So reply back…a simple "f*ck you" or "stop talking to me" would more than suffice. At least I know that you're getting my messages.

-Thank you, good day.

-Now that you've read something, he's written. Wouldn't you like to find out more about Hoss? Here you go.